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Just a way to keep track of my writings without having to dig through the Writer's forum for it. Feel free to comment, compliment and/or criticize if you wish. No need to be gentle, I am become Netizen, Consumer of Critiques. "Archive" posts will have the story/script/whatevah as well as my notes on it.
This is a full script of a story submission I attempted for the Movie Jam. I'd been taking my sweet time about writing it and the MJ seemed like an opportune time to shell it out. In retrospect, it was a bit more ambitious, confining, (and probably more lengthy) than allowed for the time frame given. I'd like some feedback on it to see if there are any other shortcomings of the material I should look into. It is, after all, a Mario-based script.
The work is based on Frank Stockton's classic short story, "The Lady, or the Tiger?"
Those interested can read that story here: http://www.eastoftheweb.com/short-stor ie s/UBooks/LadyTige.shtml
My intent in writing this story was to create a humorous script for a flash that takes its inspiration from that story, and adds a unique depth to the Princess Peach character as well as a more adult take on the games. We all know the Mario games are an unending franchise, but what would happen if it really came to an end, and someone permanently took care of that seemingly infinite array of bad guys?
<a celebration is in progress, with citizens from every corner of the Mushroom Kingdom turning out to see the newest and greatest hero of the lands - the Golden Shroom. His exploits have become legend and forged a fledgling empire that may stand for a thousand years. The royalty and her full entourage are in attendance; while they are known as heroes in their own right, fighting to defend the land, the Golden One has outshone them all. It is time for his name to be celebrated and for him to claim his reward>
The plumbers at her side, the princess rises from her throne to address the mighty mushroom before him. Looking up at him, she speaks:
Princess: Your deeds in the name of the Kingdom are without peer and your name shall be writ in history books for centuries to come! There is no way we can truly thank you for what you have accomplished, but any reward that you ask is yours for the taking. What would you have, Champion of the Ages?
His bearing is regal, his stature far beyond that of any of his kin.
Shroom: I would have but one thing.
Princess: Name it!
Shroom: I seek that which was promised by Oath of the King.
<a hush falls over the assembled crowd. The Oath of the King is held in sacred esteem; it contains all the most subtle magic of royalty in its words and binds the kingdom to the one who rules. It is worded thus, "The one who brings lasting peace to the kingdom shall be the next to rule." So it is spoken, so it is. Neither the princess nor the plumber or their companions have been able to achieve this. It is only now...>
<a series of vignettes highlight the rightness of the Golden Shroom's request.>
Vig #1: A two-fold army led by the Golden Shroom, and aided by the full power of stars and flowers held in reserve successfully razes every last one of the enemies castles to the ground. Burning rocks can be seen flying in every direction, and in the end,
Vig #2: Princesses Peach and Zelda attend the signing of the Compact of Two Kingdoms between the Mushroom Kingdom and Hyrule. The Hyrule military is revealed to be the second army that took place in those sieges, under an inspired act of diplomacy by the Golden Shroom. A lasting alliance has been formed by his doing, and both kingdoms now enjoy peace, their enemies scourged.
Vig #3: A long line of pikes stand by the ruins of these castles, adorned with the heads of the koops. No mercy was ever given, none is now granted. No refuge, no retreat. The enemy has been eradicated and never more will plague the Kingdom.
<a ll who are present know that the Golden Shroom has earned by right of word and action that which was promised. But that which was promised was the throne of the Mushroom Kingdom, and this means the hand of Peach in marriage. Almost equally known to the kingdom is the affection which she holds for the plumber, the hero Mario. To accept this oath means forever foreswearing that love that she has for him, a love equal to that for her kingdom.>
<The Golden Shroom knows the full implications of that which he asks, and he is not a cruel man. He offers the princess her out.>
Shroom: I ask only that which is promised, the kingdom itself. If you wish to abdicate and retire to a reward that you have earned, I will seek another queen to rule by my side.
<This is the choice she is offered: To seek retirement and the marital bliss that she has always wished for, or become the queen of the kingdom. She has fought long and hard to keep the kingdom in one piece against its endless horde of enemy, and she treasures the throne she was born to as much as she does her Mario.>
<The movie ends with a split-screen: On one side is pictured the princess in bridal gear driving beside a tuxedo'ed Mario in matching go-karts. On the other, what was once a cute little princess is now a regal and solemn queen, seated upon her throne next to the Shroom King.>
The decision is left to the viewer as to which she chooses. The power of the plumber?
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